I Hate Dogs

Did I mention I hate dogs? "Big dogs, little dogs, black and white dogs." Why? Because they have chased me my whole life, equally as a child and as an adult. And then we lived in the countryside in a country (Italy) that doesn't condone birth control for adults, let alone animals. So there were strays. Strays that howled through the night, stealing my sleep, and then followed me during the day, stealing my outdoor running opportunities. And forget about walking at night. That is when the packs of hungry dogs roamed freely. To make matters worse I would see my Italian neighbours adopt puppies and kittens and when they started to grow away from being puppies and kittens, or their children would tire of them, they would no longer have these animals. I can only assume they let them back in to the wild. Nice, huh?

Why this rant now? Well, I have come across 4 different dogs in my 2 mile-radius neighbourhood in the past two weeks that have been unattended. The first two were roaming aimlessly (one even chased me for a bit, of course), the third chased me as his owner stood there and watched and then had the balls to say, "you're ok." (No, I am no ok, your dog is CHASING ME.) And then the fourth, today, someone had caught and asked me if I knew to whom he belonged. Um, Satan perhaps?

Sure, there are some dogs that belong to friends that I can tolerate, mostly because the friends have enough respect to not let them get all up in my business. Though dogs do seem to have an uncanny ability to sense those who do not like them and then try to get all up in their business.

And don't say to me, "don't worry, he doesn't bite." Yes he does. Given the right set of variables, all. dogs. bite. That is their instinct. Would I put my infant on someone's lap (especially someone who does not have children and does not seem to like them) and say, "don't worry, she doesn't barf." No. Because she does barf. That is what babies do. Just as dogs bite, babies barf. That. Is. What. They. Do.

So people. Secure your canines. Because I am about to program animal control into my cell phone. A cell phone I bring on my runs with my two small children. Runs that shouldn't be wrought with the fear of being chased by your "best friends." We're not in Sicily anymore.